What drives me slightly insane about the PDA-or-not debate (not in your post, just the online debate in general!) is that it's argued in such black-and-white terms—what Mary Boyle calls brain or blame—where either something concrete is wrong with your brain, or you're 'bad' or ‘lazy’ and everything is just generally your fault. And that blame can fall on the child or the parents. Usually both, in my experience.
I know my PDA traits are real because I actively experience them, and I believe other people who say they experience them, but I don't really know where these traits come from. And I don't know that where *my* PDA traits come from is the exact same place as another PDAer. But ‘I don’t know why this happens,’ is a wildly different statement than ‘nothing’s happening.’
Like, we don’t fully understand what gravity is, but that doesn’t mean we’re all delusional about being stuck to the ground.
Absolutely, all of this. I've always said, I'm more of a grey person myself :) Definitely haven't met another PDAer who is exactly the same as our PDAer, but there are definitely similar traits that crop up a lot of the time!
I love reading your book reviews. I always go and check them out to see if you have one before I buy any book related to PDA. Alice Running's book is great.
Thank you for the mention here, Steph! Love to catch up on your writing and hear about how things are going. Chuffed for you that you’re speaking at the summit, definitely will try to catch that!
What drives me slightly insane about the PDA-or-not debate (not in your post, just the online debate in general!) is that it's argued in such black-and-white terms—what Mary Boyle calls brain or blame—where either something concrete is wrong with your brain, or you're 'bad' or ‘lazy’ and everything is just generally your fault. And that blame can fall on the child or the parents. Usually both, in my experience.
I know my PDA traits are real because I actively experience them, and I believe other people who say they experience them, but I don't really know where these traits come from. And I don't know that where *my* PDA traits come from is the exact same place as another PDAer. But ‘I don’t know why this happens,’ is a wildly different statement than ‘nothing’s happening.’
Like, we don’t fully understand what gravity is, but that doesn’t mean we’re all delusional about being stuck to the ground.
Absolutely, all of this. I've always said, I'm more of a grey person myself :) Definitely haven't met another PDAer who is exactly the same as our PDAer, but there are definitely similar traits that crop up a lot of the time!
Thank you for referencing my article and for the info on the summit.
I totally get that stepping back can be harder with some kids than others.
My younger needs a lot more hands on support so I’m not sure how that will go as she matures.
Sometimes stepping back is just let them create kitchen havoc by making their own lunch 🤷♀️
yep for sure, different amounts needed for the different children/young adults they are! :)
I love reading your book reviews. I always go and check them out to see if you have one before I buy any book related to PDA. Alice Running's book is great.
Thank you! And I agree, it is!
A great article thank you
Thanks for reading!
Thank you for the mention here, Steph! Love to catch up on your writing and hear about how things are going. Chuffed for you that you’re speaking at the summit, definitely will try to catch that!
Thank you. It's always an honour to be asked to speak!
Both personal and autism/pda/neurodivergent info
Thank you for replying! I guess I can do a bit of both :)