Happy New Year everyone! Not sure if I mentioned it already, but our book, PDA in the Family, is being published very soon. This Thursday in fact! It’s very exciting but also a little bit scary… what if people don’t like it? What if everyone was expecting more from me? Will I be upset by the inevitable bad review?!
I’m having to remind myself that I’ve done my best, both with this book and the blog. I can’t possibly have all the answers for other people, I don’t even have them all for our little family! But I am keeping my fingers crossed that this book might benefit others in some small way. Please excuse the photo below - it’s definitely not all about me, the book was a real family effort, but this was a photo op I couldn’t ignore! I was on my way home after recording my voice for the audiobook (Mr C has done the audio for his chapter too!). I’m so pleased the audiobook is available and that some people will now get to hear the book in my Northern tones (and his Southern ones…!).
There are a few general SEND (Special Educational Needs and Disabilities) parenting tips in the book, and a whole chapter about the issue of children like ours who are Not Fine in School, but my main priority was to share our experiences of living with Pathological Demand Avoidance. To help others feel not so alone, and to help more people understand that PDA is very real and needs consideration on a wider scale throughout communities.
I started the Steph’s Two Girls blog 14 years ago this month, after returning from an appointment with a paediatrician where I had been told that our 2 year old daughter was most likely autistic. Timing of when I publish posts has always been fairly erratic if I’m honest - I’ve done my best to try not to let the blog get in the way of life. Blogging has taken up a huge amount of my time and involved a lot of effort, but I think it has been worth it. I’ve written some more about this in my newly published blog post about Understanding PDA.
Writing the blog was cathartic; going on to write the book was a very different way of working and it challenged me at times. It required revisiting some of our toughest moments as a family, but it also provided an opportunity to celebrate our victories and share the lessons we've learned along the way.
I am so honoured that the book has received endorsements from two PDA experts who I have learnt so much from over the years, and who I have always admired. Phil Christie, Consultant Child Psychologist who worked closely with Professor Elizabeth Newson who first introduced the term PDA, and Ruth Fidler, Education Consultant specialising in complex presentations of autism, who has worked with Phil for many years.
And I’m thrilled that the foreword was written by adult PDAer and author Julia Daunt. I highly recommend her book, titled Being Julia.
I would have loved to hold a giant book launch party that everyone could attend in-person, because I love meeting people, but sadly that proved to be a bit too much of a challenge to organise. So instead I’m planning to have an online event on Wednesday January 24th from 7.30pm, where I will try to answer any questions about our life with PDA. Please save the time in your diary if you are interested and I will send further details very soon…. there will also be at least one opportunity to ask questions in person at a local bookshop and more events to be advertised, so hopefully you will catch me somewhere over the coming months!
You can help make a difference in terms of others understanding PDA by ensuring our book gets seen by more people - could you please write a review on the website you buy it from, and share images and news of the book online and offline wherever you can (are you on LinkedIn? Instagram? Facebook groups, Twitter, TikTok, Pinterest… anything goes!). This also goes for any of the other great books about PDA that are already out there!
Question Time
I can’t end without another little poll as I’ve had some feedback that people love these. I should let you know that mince pies won the poll for favourite Christmas food (can’t stand them, personally!) and cheese was a close second (now you’re talking!). I would love to know, whether you’ve already pre-ordered the book or if you’re thinking you might buy a copy at some point, what kind of format you will be getting it in? Is paper still king or are we more technological these days?! Or maybe you like to borrow from the library - a perfectly valid option, did you know you can ask them to order a copy in for you?!
Thanks for reading! If you have any questions, please get in touch via stephstwogirls@gmail.com or reply to this email.
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Hats off to you for doing all that it took to share your hard-earned wisdom in the form of a book! I have no doubt that your efforts will help many families